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How Do You Prepare For Sex So It Doesn’t Hurt?

A MyEndometriosisTeam Member asked a question 💭
Minneapolis, MN

A few hours after sex I ended up having SERIOUS spasims in my pelvis... how can you prevent this?

March 3, 2018
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Answer Summary

Members shared deeply personal experiences navigating painful sex with endometriosis, with many describing how different positions (especially... Read more

Members shared deeply personal experiences navigating painful sex with endometriosis, with many describing how different positions (especially being on top for greater control over depth and pace) and extensive foreplay can reduce discomfort, though several acknowledged that some days the pain is unavoidable no matter what they try. Several members recommended practical strategies including medicating beforehand, using lubricants, trying pelvic floor therapy with smaller toys for preparation, and checking resources like The Endo Twins website for additional tips. A recurring theme was the emotional toll of the condition, with members emphasizing the importance of open communication with partners about pain not being their fault, listening to your body on bad days without guilt, and finding intimacy in ways beyond intercourse when penetration becomes too painful.

A MyEndometriosisTeam Member

I honestly found a position makes a difference. This does sound a little TMI but i find being on top helps. It lets me have more control on pace and depth. Sometimes, i will use sensation lubes to help. Yes, i do orgasam this way just about everytime.

January 14, 2019
A MyEndometriosisTeam Member

I have this issue constantly and no matter how many things I try nothing helps. It has gotten to a point where I don't even like my bf touching me because I know what he wants. The arguments are so bad that he constantly accuses me of cheating though I tell him what's going on. My condition is getting worse. He's not listening not paying attention and it's making me feel depressed.

April 17, 2018
A MyEndometriosisTeam Member

I medicate before hand if I can, and it's really important to try different positions. Another thing to try to remember is to communicate A LOT with your partner about how it's not their fault and (if you do) you enjoy it and want to keep trying. Maybe try thinking of it as an opportunity to embrace foreplay more and find more ways to keep things pleasurable.

March 6, 2018
A MyEndometriosisTeam Member

We tried different positions and a massive no no for me is him on top. We have found ways to be intimate without the actual intercourse although sometimes that brings on the pain also. So frustrating isn't it! If you Google sex and endo there are quite a few good tips on the internet.

March 5, 2018
A MyEndometriosisTeam Member

I did pelvic floor therapy, and my therapist recommended using smaller toys to help your body prepare. I have found myself avoiding and/or cancelling intimate plans because of the pain, but some days are better. Listen to your body and if you're having a bad day it'll only get worse, but good days are the best days for intimacy.

May 2, 2018

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